Saturday, October 11, 2008
At first I thought my mum is OK with guys being younger than me..
See I told u if any guy out there who wish to befriend me, must know that I have a complicated family. My mum is ashamed of her husband (my stepfather) so she changed her mind and decided that I shldnt be close friends with guys being younger than me furthermore, lower educated than me..
Honestly I told her that coz she asked and she disapproved of the friendship because he has NTC-3. She knows that those who failed PSLE more than 2 or 3 times will have to go to NTC. Upon hearing that, my grandmother got even more worried la and instructed me to severe the friendship. My mum said to me, "Kau tak malu ker dgn saudara mara.. kau degree graduate and then dpt org yg PSLE pun tak pass.."
I dun like to argue with elderly.. Because to me if I were to argue - rude to the elderly.. So I have to respect them. Scared? Nope.. Respect is the word. I explained to my mum nicely that, he has NTC, a qualification higher than PSLE.. at least he went to school..
They said to me that its OK for women to be younger and less educated than the men because the men in future will be the head of the family so he must be higher educated and older than the women. Sighz..
Because of that, my mum insisted that I stayed far away from him coz his qualification is too low.. She does not mind the age but she mind the qualification.. I am aware of that but cant my mum think?
She married twice and who does she married to? She has O levels. She married my dad who only has Sec 2 (went to Malay school - means all subject taught in Malay except English) then remarried to my step dad who has only Sec 1 qualification.. also from Malay school. And is she happy with both her marriages? Aint gonna continue further, some of u have already know the answer.
Furthermore, my step dad who only has Sec 1 qualification.. earned MORE $$ than my mum! Before he works as a driver, he works in PSA earning less than $1000 but more than $700. He worked hard and got increment. When he got a new job as a driver (after securing that driving license), he earned the same salary as me! My mum who has 0 levels worked as a production operator for many many years and how much she earned? $800. With OT, she can get $1100, still it is less than my step dad.
So why cant she think?! Low education so what.. one day that person who has low qualification will earn more than u.. I know both of them dun want me to be like my mum - who married twice - thats why I have been performing my prayers and seek Allah's guidance. I believe Allah did give me his guidance.
I analyze it all. I met men before with different levels of qualification before but I dun have the confidence in them + some of them ask me for sex and money. Once they asked for these two things, out they go from my life. Remember R? I rejected him coz yeah he earned lesser than me and is lower educated than me. But why I rejected him because I didnt write in this blog abt what he asked for. So, let me tell u What he asked for.
Money. He borrowed money from me. It was long time ago before he proposed to me that he wants me to be his gf. He got a motorcycle fine for parking his motorcycle wrongly and he was short of cash and came to ME for help. I did ask him if he has asked anybody else. His answer was, no one can lend him that much money. I believe him coz the issue here: money.. How much he asked for? $300. Did I lend him? I lent him $150 only. I told him that was the only amount I can afford. He seems disappointed but still accept the $150. Did he return? Yes. $75 the next month and another $75 the following month.
And u know what? He promised that he wont borrowed from me again but a few months later, he has spent over his budget and again came to me to ask me if I could lent him $200. Enuff is enuff. Once is enuff. I told him off. Yes! I did! After that incident, he still have the nerve to contact me - its OK as friends - but he sound me to be his gf.. No way! Belum jadi gf, dia dah minta pinjam duit, kalau dah jadi gf, bukan pinjam duit, tapi give duit! I can tolerate any other things but guys asking for sex, one nite stands and money simply turned me off!
My otak buntu. My sister told me that my grandmother may have hasut my mother. My mother seemed to be OK.. She does not mind as long as he treated me good. Then upon hearing that he has lower qualifcation than me, dah lain lak.. Sighz..
Here's what my sister's sms to me (she cant tell me coz my granny will hear so she sms la), "U see la.. U tell too soon.. See what nonsense nenek talking.. I see A is a nice guy." I replied to that and her reply, "I know.. Chill ok? She thinks too much la.. Ugh.. Nenek keeps talking abt money.."
Yeah she did! She thinks that A is out there chasing after my money.. Sighz.. And she kept saying, "Khalid dgn dia lagi tinggi pelajaran Khalid." (My brother and A, my brother is higher educated than A.) Not only that, she also blurted out this, "Agak nyer dia nak duit la tu jadi dia cari pompuan yg lebih tua.." Why must she thinks A is after MY $$. Dont make me lose my patience coz if I do, I may just revealed all those guys whom I ever met who are older than me, same educational level as me and guess what? ASK FOR MONEY.. Yeah! One more time, she assumes A is this, A is that.. I'm gonna say that ok!
FMA's advice:
C'mon la. U shld not fear / hurt with ur nenek's harsh words. U just smile @ her. Ur mum reminds ur nenek of her broken marriage. Whatever she spits @ u, u shld take her woeds coz she wants u to think carefully or dont want u to be stupid like ur mum who has a failed marriage. U hve to discuss with him to be serious focus on both ur future like financial management etc to shut ur nenek up. Just let her carry on with her harsh words till she is tired, she will stop. Think carefully, of nenek wants u to have older men but he has low / no qualification makes no difference coz as long as love is found on both of u.
HAM's comment:
Ini dah mcm Antara 2 Darjat.
My reply: Yup, mmg like Antara 2 Darjat, cerita P. Ramlee. My relatives are all very highly respectable in terms of their educational level and their occupation. Master holder married Bachelor Degree. Bachelor Degree married Bachelor Degree / Diploma. Diploma married Diploma / A Levels. A levels married Higher NITEC. Higher NITEC married with Higher Nitec / Nitec / O Levels. And those O level holder married with O levels (no cousin of mine is up to N level. All after N or O level, proceed to ITE education)
If it is really jodoh (yeah, i know i let nature / fate takes its course) between me and A.. Our qualification level is already too much of a difference.. Bachelor Degree with NTC (NITEC - in this case) So dah mmg lah ni mcm ANTARA 2 DARJAT!
